SHE’S THE “KIM K” OF KMER. GET OVER IT!!

TYYY

The Phoenix Herself. Nathalie Nkoah

In case you don’t have a clue who I alias the Kim K of Kmer, am talking about the one and only Nathalie NKoah. (If you’re lost,Google her). So she wrote a book and now you have more reason to hate her huh? Well for the sake of professionalism I’ll give you a recap on who Nathalie is. She is a twenty something year old Cameroonian who had a long standing relationship with Cameroons’ Golden Boy, Samuel Eto’o who by the way has a wife and kids. Well one thing led to another and Cameroonians together with the world woke up one fine morning to the nude pictures of Nathalie crawling the internet. Doesn’t matter to me how they got there. Bottom line is they were already exposed and guilty or not,sinner or saint her world came crushing from all angles.

Now I know some of you have little or no pity for Nathalie and I get your rage. Yes she is a homewrecker. Yes she is a Gold Digger who got what she deserved for shacking up with a famous married man and living it up with his money from Paris to New York. That however is not my point of focus. Just as an aside though I’ll say I bet there are hundreds of girls who will gladly trade places with the Version of Nathalie without the trouble in Paradise  (ooh please stop rolling your eyes, Its Samuel Eto’o. THE Samuel Eto’o) but since we all playing the Holier than thou card, keep throwing stones and judging.

My angle of interest in this story is the fact that rather than rolling over and letting the circumstances she found herself in crush her, Nathalie decided to turn her lemons into lemonade and that pisses people off? Let me ask you. Do you have any idea how many people commit suicide after such deep humiliation and cyber bullying? What would have been a better headline for you? ”Eto’o Fils’ mistress Nathalie Nkoah Kills herself after nude photos of her flood the internet”. Is that OK? Or is the headline “Nathalie Nkoah launches her own custom made lingerie line, PSYCHEE By NK” not a better one for you? Guess it was OK for you every time Kim Kardashian launched a fragrance, or lingerie line or video game or whatever it is she does these days. Don’t get me wrong. Am not saying the life she led was OK. Am not saying having an affair with a married man is OK. Am saying taking nude photos and sending them to someone you trust and are in a relationship with is not far from absurd these days. Before you give me that look, you know that’s the Ugly Truth. Thanks to technology and the smart world we live in, nude photos are almost as frequent and easy to come by as decent pictures.

Let me give you a case scenario. Imagine it was you and some guy you were in love with and trusted at the time of exchange of nude photos. Things turn sour, he turns on you and exposes them. So what now? You roll over and die? What’s done is done. These pictures will forever be a part of your life. Google search engine will have the story for eternity so whether you die or live, its out there already. Love it or not people are obsessed with really bizarre stories so it’s up to you to make a fortune out of a misfortune and make the most of a situation you cannot change. She got super infamous for her nude pictures so why not make a living in a craft she apparently knows so well, Expressing Sexuality. That explains the lingerie line Psychee by NK. She then realized it was time to tell her own side of the story. So she wrote a book, Revenge Porn. I will be mad too if i were her so yea, its totally OK she clears whats left of her dignity and why not make some money off it. Shebi na the matter di vex u? She turning a mess into a mine field.

Can you all just give her a break and get over it? Shes moving on and making big bucks. Why are you stuck on hating and judging? While you’re at it remember that negative press is excellent press. So the more you hate, the more relevant she stays and I bet you she will be working on her next project to make the most of this spotlight that’s shining on her. She is the “Kim K of Kmer”. I know we Africans have different values and virtues. Kim’s world is different from ours but who says we can’t all let the girl be and get over it like the 90% of the world that  has accepted the brand that started from a leaked sex tape called Kim K?!! She’s a Phoenix and whether you like it or not, She is rising from the ashes. Now can we discuss more pertinent issues like our government ,the economy and that new great song by Magasco? Whats it called again? Got it. “Ohh bang bang……wolililili ….going bangne”. See? Told you there is more to explore in this great nation than hating on Nathalie Nkoah.

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Dear ”Main Chick”,

 

dearI hope this letter meets you well and by well I mean either in the comfort of his home zapping TV channels like a boss chick or in the “main Chick” seat of his car if he got one(only main chicks know that seat hahahahahaha). How are you? I bet you feel pretty confident about your relationship and all that. Well honey good for you. I don’t mean to burst your bubble or anything like that but i just want to clear up a few things for you. OK? Lets get started then.

   So you are his madam abi? And you are sure of that because? He showed you off to all his friends and you all probably hang out together every time I guess. So that makes you pretty confident about your main chick position huh? Well if it makes you sleep at night, keep driving that fantasy bus. Since we are on the subject of his friends i will like you to know that if he has “duplicates”of you as in your co-main chicks (No, i don’t mean side chicks) they know them by face and name and non of them will ever breathe a word about it to you. Yea, If you didn’t know guys have this thing they honor more than their loyalty to females and its called the “guy code”. They will NEVER tell on their buddy. So while you are busy on the weekends in the kitchen sweating over a big pot of cornfufu because your man told you his friends are coming over for lunch, keep that in mind.

You do remember those classes back in your school days where you learned about different species or classes of things but then the teacher emphasizes on one as the MAIN ONE right? Well the same applies to you if you don’t drop that “main chick” name. (I know its a trendy name but I attach more meaning to it). The fact that you keep referring to yourself as the main chick just means that u acknowledge that in spite of all the other chicks he is doing the dirty with,you are OK with it as long as you are the main chick. So can you please tell me why you are always trying to unblock his phone, check his messages, stalk his Instagram page and walk on tipped toes while he is asleep just so you can snoop around his house? Of course he has side chicks. It’s thanks to them that you are the MAIN chick. There is no MAIN anything without subs or minors.

So here is how we will correct this issue. Say you are his girl, his only woman and  his Queen. Let him know that. Carry yourself with such  grandeur that he can’t help but realize that you are the limited edition of yourself. You are not the head of his girlfriend clan but you are the CLAN itself. If he can’t see that then boo boo trade that Joker card for the King card. You wouldn’t have to be the main chick to a king, you are his reigning queen. So enough of all that “I’m his airport crap. If he flies around he will return on my runway”. Well i have news for you, runways crack and wear out due to continuous usage so pick a better side. Be his airplane and let him reach greater heights with you, sounds better right? So you sleep good at night knowing that in cheap gossip people say “ooh he is sleeping with A but B is his main chick”. Really sister? Really? Now lets go get that crown and show him queening is in our DNA.

No, he is not going to wife you because you played “wife” during your mandate as main chick. There is no guarantee, no insurance so stop playing wife . If he doesn’t see you as wife material or as the right life partner for him no amount of wife role play will change that. So just enjoy your relationship, be you, stop pushing and don’t get too comfortable. However  if you don’t see a future down the road and that is what you want, hand over your crown to the next Missy willing to take her chances with him and take that pretty head of yours to find a better crown. You deserve it. Let the side chicks brag about being the main chick. (Bet they do every time) We both know they don’t matter once you upgrade to queen because then they seize to exist or even better they become your handmaidens and serve you hahahahahaha.

Well, thought I’ll write you this letter in my capacity as a former main chick hihihihihi now queening is what I do and you should too. The world will be a better place with less B*****s, main chicks and side chicks just queens who will someday raise even better queens and why not kings.  P.S. Always keep your chin up, lest your crown falls off. Love You!

Yours Truly,

Sammy.

SO WHAT???!!!

I know the new year is well into its first quarter and am guessing most of you have a list full of resolutions as well as things you hope to achieve this year. Well, congratulations… u started off on a good foot.However I’ll like to add one more intriguing statement that i think like me, u should add to your list of resolutions. It’s very simple. It starts with So…and ends with What SO WHAT?!!

This statement right here can change your whole perspective….by just saying it out loud. It makes you feel better on many different levels.It reduces stress levels and increases positive vibe instantaneously.

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make your 2016 a stress free zone

OK So What last year sucked? So what you failed yourself or others? So what things didn’t turn out as you hoped? So What that chick you invested so much in left you and got hitched to some rich guy this  December ( OK i know that hurt but So What)  So Goddamn What?!!! You will find some better mannered girl who will love you for you and appreciate you. wouldn’t you like that better?.  In fact try saying SO WHAT out loud right now. Done it? Feel any better? See … that’s what i thought. You have a chance to do right by you and by those who look up to you this year. You have a whole year in front of you. Speak life, success, faith,expectations, fruitfulness and what have you into your year. Just think about those who didn’t make it through last year but you little warrior are still here. Don’t know about you but to me that just means my work here isn’t done and instead of holding on to regrets and “what ifs”, hold on to “So What” and “I can”.

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So What??

You will be amazed by how much energy you will pick up from just brushing off situations and negative vibe. Make optimism your priority this year. So what you lost your job ? Get up, hustle up and find yourself a new and better one. People only react to what parts of you, you show them. Show them you are disappointed in yourself and they will treat you as a failure. Show them you have little or no self respect and they will disrespect you any way they can. Show them you are weak and they will trample all over you. So it doesn’t matter if you are dying inside, say So What and wear a smile (Ohh ladies add makeup to that smile ) and carry on. I bet you something great will happen and awaken your dying spirit within thanks to your beaming outward appearance.

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This is what happens when you say So What??

“Why shall you shy of entering 2016 with a bang and making it a blast? Is it not a years like any other years?” (hahahaha if u haven’t seen that funny Nigerian clip where i got this quotes from ask a friend to forward it to u via watsapp ASAP). Well all that said, here is to wishing you a stress free 2016 filled with positive vibe and cheerful hearts. Lemme borrow the slogan my bestie gave me as our motto for this year and share with you all “Faith. Focus. Finish”. You ready? Leggo! God Bless you and your Hustle this year and toujours!

Love, Samy.